complete

your eyes .. stare at me .. blazing blue and green ..
your hands reaching for me .. intimidating me .
your lips close to mine .. your breath on mine ..
your hands hit my hips and send electricity through my body ..
my heart suddenly jerks and i can feel once again ..
after what seems like forever feeling so numb of emotions ..
i can feel .. i feel every emotion possible ..
your finger tips drizzling down my spine .. electricity ..
electricity that makes me weak in the knees ..
electricity that makes me cry ..
my eyes start to well up and fall.. streams down my face ..
you wipe my tears and kiss me softly ..
...nothing has every felt so right ..
you feel so amazing .. every piece of you .. screams perfection ..
i am damaged .. i am fragile beneath my hard shell ..
you're the only one who could break it ..
but will you break my heart too ? ..
you give me your words .. words mean nothing ..
i give you me .. all of me .. every inch of me is yours ..
and now you are complete .. you are perfect ..
and i am complete .. i am not perfect .. but i am complete ..
i still have scars and i still have bruises ..
but you are the reason that i can say i am ohkay !

I can still hear the waves .

i was laying in the sand, it was late afternoon, i could hear the waves crashing on the shore, it sounded peaceful, it sounded like love. I could see the moon floating above the clouds in the east, and the sun spilling orange paint all over the sky in the west, that sun is so clumsy, but beautiful. I could smell the ocean, it smelled like home, the breeze was warm, comforting. The sand was soft and the sea shells were pretty. Crabs were walking across the sand to investigate the shore, i smiled when they tried to run from the tide. Running sideways to try and stay out of the sea. The wave would flow over the sand, then pull back, it left behind a little orange starfish. i stood up and walked over to it. It was still alive. I threw him back into the sea and could sense that he was great full for my good deed. Have a long and happy life little starfish. Pelicans flew across the horizon, swooping down to grab a fish. All i could imagine was colourful coral and beautiful stingrays and rainbow fish. As i was daydreaming, in the deep i saw a dolphin jump, and then another. The dolphins were playing near the shore and i felt so lucky to be able to watch them. I return to the ocean everyday. It calms be down, it erases my sadness and it erases the anger from everyday life. Even when I’m not sitting beside the sea, i can still hear the waves .

sea of dreams

i wake up and walk through my house,

colourful rocks fill the hall,

and the end of the hall i don’t see the kitchen,

i don’t see anymore wall,

colourful plants sway through the breezeless air,

the sky shimmers with light,

I’m defying gravity i sit and float,

as i swim through the night,

rainbow fish and corral reefs,

there are star fish in the sky,

dolphins spot me and i wave,

and they reply a joyful cry,

stingrays rest in the sand,

sea shells colour the ground,

sea turtles shells skim my fingers,

i love this world I’ve found,

soon enough i see a whale,

he swims right over my head,

sand and shells fly through the water,

and lead me back towards my bed,

i look back to the ocean one more time,

before i go to sleep,

i wake in the morning,

and found something from the deep,

a pink seashell lay beside me,

but how could it be,

so the next night i go back,

and i return it to the sea .

Sanity

these blue eyes, are synchronized, but behind them I'm not so organized.
secrets linger from the past, pain that seems to always last,
different day, different life, maybe i wouldn’t turn to the knife,
but life is hard and pain is real, and this suffering numbs all the feel,
people pass, emotions cry, no one else can see them, only I,
and so i shake, fear sets in, but all that i can do is grin,
my friends are soft, they comfort me, so for now i keep my sanity.

crimson lines .

damage ..
pain .. sad stories .. broken pieces .. shards of glass ..
slicing crimson lines into my flesh ..
wounds of sorrow .. wounds of wise .. wounds of red .. wounds of ice ..
sweet sorrow .. sweet loneliness ..
bittersweet love ..
let it all run down ..

abandoned ..
pain .. loneliness rips apart my soul ..
i race the world through crimson streets ..
i race with a heavy heart .. i'm losing ..
eyes fill with sadness .. eyes fill with lost hope .. eyes fill with loneliness ..
let it all run down ..

crimson lines .. crimson tears ..
shedding as i walk ..
crimson gas can ..
crimson doorways .. crimson footprints ..
crimson lines that lead to that place ..
that place where i let it all run down ..

where i'm not found ..
crimson floor that i lay on .. crimson window sill .. crimson walls ..
never found ..
i poisoned this world .. so i light a match ..
and now i'm being burned ..
i fly away with crimson wings ..

drunk .

intoxicated ..
malibu .. lovin the rum ..
the taste of ur breath ..the feeling of ur skin on mine ..
everyone around us .. lost in the music .. ur hands roaming around my rib cage ..
pulling me closer .. the taste of ur breath .. hotter than before .. our lips touch .. and sends an electric pulse down my spine .. alcohol .. blurred vision .. reality isnt as close as normal .. but you're 100% real .. the music is blarring .. weed in the air .. bottles of alcohol clinging throughout the crowd .. people introducing themselves .. dancing .
and we slip away into the party .. you and i ..
and now .. i pray that i'll remember this moment ..

should that be me ?

you and i ..skin on skin . tension .
our lips touch .. electricity .. down my spine .
my best friend .. you are .. but right now you're so much more .
i know you may not feel the same ... you're with her ..
her picture is the background on your phone .. should that be me ?
maybe not .. i mean .. you're my best friend ..
you're the one i run too when i need someone to lean on ..
you're the one thats there and listens when i need someone to care ..
you're the one who holds me close and you're the one who calms me down .
when i have a nightmare and wake up sick .. you're the one thing that can clear my mind of trauma ..
i cant let myself fall for you .. though you may just be the one ..
my feelings are mixed up .. you're with her .. should that be me ?
i'm baffled and confused .. emotions tear me up .. i dont know what should happen ..
but i've been told that whats meant to be will find its way ..
and you're still with her .. but i cant help but wonder ..
should that be me ?